Ahh the quick and dirty. As the title indicates something sinister and nasty. I have always contended that the human being is motivated primarily by Lust and Fear. Fear keeps us alive long enough to procreate the specie, lust. Lust and fear each deal with immediate gratification. But immediate gratification is a child’s game that one must grow out of. It is the crib we are born with to survive on this planet as naked and defenseless suckling mammals. Unless the human being learns delayed gratification they will never be joining the harvest season of life. It is the bridges we learn how to build across the rivers of life and not the walking across the bridge that builds the self esteem of living. Ah backstairs and love affairs. (more…)
There was a family meeting where a young 20-something male was discussing whether he should let his girlfriend know about his jealousy. This particular situation involved the taboo of dating in the workplace. Of course, in their workplace, the exclusive relationship was kept a secret from workplace employees. Hence, other male employees as well as customers would flirt with his girl. The ugly head of jealousy surfaced!
Where is your goat tied up? This metaphor, “Where your goat is tied up” means “What bothers you?” What causes you to feel pain?
In front of a married couple, I gave the advice to this young man that he should never allow anybody, especially friends and lovers, to know “where your goat is tied up.”
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The eyes tell us who we are. Joseph Campbell, the guru of mythology, tells us that in evolution, the eyes were the last sense to develop. It’s the infancy of human development. Therefore, we are curious animals and we love to see ourselves. This is why we have a fascination with film and television. Each sitcom in a decade reflects back on who we are and we love to watch ourselves in action; it’s hypnotic.
When teaching classes at the university to graduate students, I help them to finally understand that there are laws of human behavior that govern our actions and reactions and how we interact is not chaos but we can manage and control and direct. Like government propaganda reprogramming the human being. Once they have this understanding, I ask them: “what do you appear to be to the people that see you? You stand in front of your students on a daily basis. Do you know what you project to them? Do you control what you project? If you do not, then you are out of control and you are allowing the environment and other people to determine what you teach and how you direct.” (more…)
The geometric tests that are given to show whether or not they have basic geometric designs begin at birth, but they are genetic. When the child is born they see the buttocks and they see the breasts and so the first geometric forms that are drawn become circles. They then move to the birth canal, which is the umbilical chord, and so they come back to it. As the a child becomes more socially oriented the geometric designs they create become more complex.
I find it interesting that when I talk to people, I see them get nervous and have a lot of anxiety. How they first deal with their anxiety is they go back to geometric designs and they begin to straighten up tables, they begin to straighten up books and put the pencils in the right direction. They put the coffee cup where it needs to be. It gives them a sense of control and a sense of space because there world has been thrown into some type of chaos.
If you watch your own self, you begin doing that yourself. It’s interesting to watch people. Watch people when they are in a situation of anxiety in which they have difficulty handling. The first thing they do is begin to straighten up the room; they put things into place. We are all human beings.
This is Dr. b reminding you, we are not alone.